The “You’re an Idiot” Guide to Cat Ownership - A short list of things NOT to do with your cat.
One of the benefits of living in the “Centertown” area of Ottawa is that you get to witness the very strange behaviour from the unique demographic in the area. The housing ranges from huge old houses occupied by new families of public servants, huge old houses transformed into three or four unit apartments for young professionals, huge decrepit old houses transformed into three or four student apartments, and over-crowded row-houses. All these people are attracted to the proximity to three Royal Oaks, dozens of Chinese, Thai, Vietnamese, and Indian restaurants, two high schools, a half dozen elementary schools, dog parks, bus routes, and lots of trees. While living in this little neighbourhood, I’ve been witness to many strange sights. There is the guy who rides his bike all day blowing a whistle, the random domestic screaming matches, people carrying furniture on their heads, and the crack park that lies a block away.
Lately, however, I’ve noticed a disturbing trend. I hope, for the sake of felines everywhere that these are just isolated incidents and that the behaviour will not be disseminated further. I have a message for the perpetrators of this behaviour: “Cats are not dogs, no matter how hard you believe!”
It all started on evening whilst K and I were enjoying our front stoop. We spotted a young lady walking her cat. WALKING HER CAT. Who the hell walks a cat? Moreover, how exactly do you walk a cat? And why? What purpose does walking a cat serve other than to inspire the anger of this blogger. Are you trying to get your cat to exercise more, loose weight, and live longer? Trust me, a cat will sooner die of embarrassment from being harnessed to a four foot rope than it will from being overweight. Unlike dogs, cats aren’t interested in getting their fifteen minutes of daily exercise, and they are even less interested in walking down a sidewalk along side you. If your are adamant that your cat needs the type of exercise and inter-feline social relations that can only be found outside of your apartment, then get it some shots and set it free.
Then, as I was walking to work one morning a few days later, I saw a different cat on a leash tied to a front porch. I now walk past that cat every morning, sitting on the front step on a short leash. What is a cat going to do on a leash? It can’t chase birds or bugs, it can’t hang with other cats and yowl at the moon. It can be the laughing stock of the other neighbourhood cats who stray-cat strut by and tease it from just outside the leash’s range. All the cat can do is the same thing it does inside; look around and lament that it isn’t able to run free.
I am a recent pet owner. We acquired a pair of cats a year ago. They are K’s first pet, and my first since my hamster, Hammy, died when I was ten. Gibson and Kishka are strictly indoor cats mainly because they have no way of getting in and out of our apartment, but they’ve tried. We live with two little Houdinis, always braced and ready to escape. They made it onto our third floor balcony a few times, but we were too afraid that they would jump after a fly and hurt themselves to allow them free reign out there.
As such, they are big sissies and would not survive ten minutes in the real world. But they don’t know that. Kishka likes to growl at the pigeons on the ledge outside our window, but I think the pigeons would get the best of her if it the confrontation ever escalated. If Gibson ever escaped, he would just lounge on the front lawn somewhere.
In the end, I’m no cat expert. If you want to take your cat for a walk, then go ahead. Be my guest. As far as I’m concerned, this is how cats should live:
D.
post script: Thanks to K and her blog for the readily accessible photos of our muffins.
Lately, however, I’ve noticed a disturbing trend. I hope, for the sake of felines everywhere that these are just isolated incidents and that the behaviour will not be disseminated further. I have a message for the perpetrators of this behaviour: “Cats are not dogs, no matter how hard you believe!”
It all started on evening whilst K and I were enjoying our front stoop. We spotted a young lady walking her cat. WALKING HER CAT. Who the hell walks a cat? Moreover, how exactly do you walk a cat? And why? What purpose does walking a cat serve other than to inspire the anger of this blogger. Are you trying to get your cat to exercise more, loose weight, and live longer? Trust me, a cat will sooner die of embarrassment from being harnessed to a four foot rope than it will from being overweight. Unlike dogs, cats aren’t interested in getting their fifteen minutes of daily exercise, and they are even less interested in walking down a sidewalk along side you. If your are adamant that your cat needs the type of exercise and inter-feline social relations that can only be found outside of your apartment, then get it some shots and set it free.
Then, as I was walking to work one morning a few days later, I saw a different cat on a leash tied to a front porch. I now walk past that cat every morning, sitting on the front step on a short leash. What is a cat going to do on a leash? It can’t chase birds or bugs, it can’t hang with other cats and yowl at the moon. It can be the laughing stock of the other neighbourhood cats who stray-cat strut by and tease it from just outside the leash’s range. All the cat can do is the same thing it does inside; look around and lament that it isn’t able to run free.
I am a recent pet owner. We acquired a pair of cats a year ago. They are K’s first pet, and my first since my hamster, Hammy, died when I was ten. Gibson and Kishka are strictly indoor cats mainly because they have no way of getting in and out of our apartment, but they’ve tried. We live with two little Houdinis, always braced and ready to escape. They made it onto our third floor balcony a few times, but we were too afraid that they would jump after a fly and hurt themselves to allow them free reign out there.
As such, they are big sissies and would not survive ten minutes in the real world. But they don’t know that. Kishka likes to growl at the pigeons on the ledge outside our window, but I think the pigeons would get the best of her if it the confrontation ever escalated. If Gibson ever escaped, he would just lounge on the front lawn somewhere.
In the end, I’m no cat expert. If you want to take your cat for a walk, then go ahead. Be my guest. As far as I’m concerned, this is how cats should live:
D.
post script: Thanks to K and her blog for the readily accessible photos of our muffins.
